At first glance, one may be tempted to mock and ridicule this bathroom design. He may even consider it a major architectural design flaw, or theorize that perhaps the construction workers were drinking on the job. However, that is the furthest thing from the truth. In fact, this design was intentional, and offers some unique advantages over traditional bathroom designs. For example:
1. It prevents the cat from becoming trapped in the bathroom.
2. It is easier to hear when the bathtub water is overflowing.
3. It lowers the risk of suicide.
4. It motivates members of multi-member families to not spend more than their allotted time in the bathroom each morning.
5. An angry spouse can never slam the bathroom door in your face when there is a disagreement.
6. A creaking door will never give you away when you sneak into the bathroom in the wee hours of the morning to do whatever you are doing in there.
7. Inhibits reading girlie mags while sitting on the john.
Feel free to add other positive aspects of this type of bathroom design. There are obviously many more.
“Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works WITH MEEKNESS OF WISDOM.” James 3:13, KJV
“And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient, IN MEEKNESS INSTRUCTING THOSE THAT OPPOSE THEMSELVES; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth; And that they may recover themselves out of the snare of the devil, who are taken captive by him at his will.” 2 Timothy 2:24-26, KJV
“Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, RESTORE SUCH AN ONE IN THE SPIRIT OF MEEKNESS; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.” Galatians 6:1, KJV
“What will ye? shall I come unto you with a rod, or in love, and IN THE SPIRIT OF MEEKNESS?” 1 Corinthians 4:21, KJV
“I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, WITH ALL LOWLINESS AND MEEKNESS, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” Ephesians 4:1-3, KJV
To see many more of my KJV Bible verse lists, go to:
This Bill’s Bible Basics page contains clickable links to articles and series authored by online evangelist and writer, Bill Kochman, regarding the topics of depression, loneliness, self-pity and fighting back and staying positive and busy for the Lord.
To access this page, please go to the following URL:
If you should at any time see or encounter the creature which is shown in the accompanying photograph, do NOT make any attempt to approach it; because if you do, it may very well be the last thing that you ever do in this present life.
In particular, do NOT make any attempt to smash it with your foot! I repeat, even though you may be very tempted to do so, do NOT make any attempt to smash the creature with your foot! I cannot over-emphasize the importance of this point! Allow me to explain to you why this health advisory is being issued.
As should be rather evident by its appearance, this devilish-looking creature possesses a very hard exoskeleton. That being the case, if you were to really try smashing it with your foot, it is quite possible — and in fact, highly likely — that one of its very sharp appendages would penetrate your footwear — assuming you are wearing any — and thus pierce deeply into the flesh of your foot.
Now, my friend, this is where the REAL danger begins, so beware, and pay close attention to the following paragraphs!
You see, similar to lionfish, scorpionfish and stonefish which inhabit the Pacific Ocean — and other tropical regions of the world’s oceans — which can very seriously injure — and in rare cases even kill — a distracted diver or snorkeler who accidentally steps on them, the deadly barbs on this hideous-looking creature can ALSO inject poison into one’s bloodstream.
My friend, believe me when I tell you that it is an experience which you will never ever forget for as long as you live! That is, assuming that you even live long enough to tell the tale!
You see, the minute that poison enters your body — even worse than a rattlesnake or a black mamba bite — a fiery pain will immediately begin to expand outward and upward through your foot and leg as the venom travels through your bloodstream.
Within mere seconds, your foot and leg will turn red and begin to swell. Within a few minutes, both your foot and leg will be as swollen as an over-inflated beachball as uncontrollable muscle spasms begin to violently shake your body.
My friend, please understand that you have only a few minutes left to live. Unless you take immediate corrective action, the minute that fast-traveling venom hits your heart, you are DEAD! Guaranteed!
There is something else that you need to know about this creature. It is an ambush predator. In its natural environment, if it feels threatened, unlike many other animals, it will NOT adopt a threatening or defensive posture. Instead, it will remain absolutely still until its attacker is up close.
Then, with lightening speed, a very fast reflex and a sharp thrust — similar to a porcupine — it will expand its appendages, thus making sure that one of its lethal appendages will penetrate the body of its attacker.
The reason why you need to be aware of this ambush tactic, is so that out of your human curiosity, you don’t foolishly place your face directly in front of the creature in order to examine it more closely. You’ve been warned!
Regarding what corrective action you should take, I apologize, but I haven’t gotten to the end of the comic book yet. Sorry! In fact, at this point, I am not even certain if an antidote exists!
Now, if you have read this advisory up until this point, then I congratulate you for being the most gullible person on the planet. Well done!
It was recently reported that an individual by the name of Methuselah lost his Social Security benefits due to the ongoing downsizing of the American government.
I am very sorry, but I must firmly, and resolutely, and with every fiber of my being, reject the preposterous claim which is being made by this announcement.
Be it known this day that being as Mr. Methuselah was NOT born within any state or territory of the United States of America, he is NOT in possession of either a valid United States issued birth certificate, or a valid American passport.
As such, he does NOT qualify as a bona fide American citizen, despite whatever claims he may make to the contrary.
Furthermore, be it known this day that there is not a single shred of physical evidence to sustain his claim that he ever held a single job within the United States of America.
If Mr. Methuselah did in fact hold a job — or jobs — within the United States, he did so as an illegal alien.
If Mr. Methuselah did hold one or more jobs within the United States of America, there is no evidence that he ever paid federal or local taxes. As such, not only is he an illegal alien, but he is an intentional tax dodger as well.
Also be informed that if Mr. Methuselah is in possession of an American birth certificate, surely it must be forged; particularly if said document states his age to be 969 years.
Being as Mr. Methuselah was not born within the United States, does not own a valid US passport or birth certificate, never legally worked within the United States of America, and never paid taxes within the United States, he is most certainly not entitled to Social Security benefits.
In light of the aforementioned facts, Mr. Methuselah is strongly encouraged to self-deport immediately, before the full weight of American law is brought against him. This warning applies to Mr. Methuselah’s immediate illegal family members and descendants as well.
I thought we needed a day between Saturday and Sunday So I worked on it … Hmmph … Errrm … Umph. It took a bit of pushing and pulling on those letters, but I think that I found found the perfect unified solution of Saturday and Sunday. Here ya go:
SAUNTERDAY.
You can just relax & saunter around doing nothing. So how did I do?
This Bill’s Bible Basics page contains clickable links to articles and series authored by online evangelist and writer, Bill Kochman, regarding the topic of Big Business and all the things related to it such as hiring practices, the profit margin, tariffs and the import/export business, illegal immigrants and more.
To access this page, please go to the following URL:
Using one of the words or phrases which is included in the following list, please describe your current age bracket by posting it in the comment section below.
Hint: No one can really see you, so please feel free to lie, cheat or exaggerate if you feel so led, and if it makes you feel better about yourself. We won’t hold it against you. Honest!
Thank you!
infant
child
young
teenager
young adult
adult
middle-aged
elderly
old
over-the-hill
very old
one foot on a banana peel
ancient
walking dead
dead
It would be funny if it wasn’t so sad. The social networks are all full of undoubtedly thousands — perhaps millions? — of bogus user accounts. Hardly a day goes by that I don’t acquire a handful of new female followers, all of whom seem to suffer from the very same symptoms, and all of whom are looking for a serious relationship and a decent guy.
Yeah. Uh-huh. Right.
Let me guess. Your name is really Omar, and you live in Pakistan, Nigeria or India.
“By terrible things in righteousness wilt thou answer us, O God of our salvation; who art the confidence of all the ends of the earth, and of them that are afar off upon the sea:” Psalm 65:5, KJV
“Be not afraid of sudden fear, neither of the desolation of the wicked, when it cometh. For the LORD shall be thy confidence, and shall keep thy foot from being taken. Proverbs 3:25-26, KJV
“In the fear of the LORD is strong confidence: and his children shall have a place of refuge. Proverbs 14:26, KJV
“And we have confidence in the Lord touching you, that ye both do and will do the things which we command you.” 2 Thessalonians 3:4, KJV
“But Christ as a son over his own house; whose house are we, if we hold fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm unto the end . . . For we are made partakers of Christ, if we hold the beginning of our confidence stedfast unto the end;” Hebrews 3:6, 14, KJV
“Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward. For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise.” Hebrews 10:35-36, KJV
“And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us: And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him. 1 John 5:14-15, KJV
To see many more of my KJV Bible verse lists, go to:
“Thus saith the LORD; Cursed be the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the LORD.” Jeremiah 17:5, KJV
“It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man. It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in princes.” Psalm 118:8-9, KJV
“Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a broken tooth, and a foot out of joint.” Proverbs 25:19, KJV
“Trust ye not in a friend, put ye not confidence in a guide: keep the doors of thy mouth from her that lieth in thy bosom. Micah 7:5, KJV
“For we are the circumcision, which worship God in the spirit, and rejoice in Christ Jesus, and have no confidence in the flesh.” Philippians 3:3, KJV
To see many more of my KJV Bible verse lists, go to:
“For the Son of man is NOT COME TO DESTROY MEN’S LIVES, BUT TO SAVE THEM. and they went to another village.” Luke 9:56, KJV
“The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, NOT WILLING THAT ANY SHOULD PERISH, but that all should come to repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9, KJV
“Have I any pleasure at all that the wicked should die? saith the Lord GOD: and not THAT HE SHOULD RETURN FROM HIS WAYS, AND LIVE?” Ezekiel 18:23, KJV
“Say unto them, As I live, saith the Lord GOD, I HAVE NO PLEASURE IN THE DEATH OF THE WICKED; BUT THAT THE WICKED TURN FROM HIS WAY AND LIVE: turn ye, turn ye from your evil ways; for why will ye die, O house of Israel?” Ezekiel 33:11, KJV
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him SHOULD NOT PERISH, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; BUT THAT THE WORLD THROUGH HIM MIGHT BE SAVED.” John 3:16-17, KJV
To see many more of my KJV Bible verse lists, go to:
“Remember, and forget not, how thou provokedst the LORD thy God to wrath in the wilderness: from the day that thou didst depart out of the land of Egypt, until ye came unto this place, YE HAVE BEEN REBELLIOUS AGAINST THE LORD. Also in Horeb ye provoked the LORD to wrath, so that the LORD was angry with you to have destroyed you . . . YE HAVE BEEN REBELLIOUS AGAINST THE LORD from the day that I knew you.” Deuteronomy 9:7-8, 24, KJV
“Take this book of the law, and put it in the side of the ark of the covenant of the LORD your God, that it may be there for a witness against thee. For I KNOW THY REBELLION, AND THY STIFF NECK: behold, while I am yet alive with you this day, YE HAVE BEEN REBELLIOUS AGAINST THE LORD; and how much more after my death?” Deuteronomy 31:26-27, KJV
“And Moses said unto the LORD, Wherefore hast thou afflicted thy servant? and wherefore have I not found favour in thy sight, that thou layest the burden of all this people upon me? Have I conceived all this people? have I begotten them, that thou shouldest say unto me, Carry them in thy bosom, as a nursing father beareth the sucking child, unto the land which thou swarest unto their fathers?” Numbers 11:11-12, KJV
“Woe to the REBELLIOUS CHILDREN, saith the LORD, that take counsel, but not of me; and that cover with a covering, but not of my spirit, that they may add sin to sin: That walk to go down into Egypt, and have not asked at my mouth; to strengthen themselves in the strength of Pharaoh, and to trust in the shadow of Egypt! Therefore shall the strength of Pharaoh be your shame, and the trust in the shadow of Egypt your confusion . . . Now go, write it before them in a table, and note it in a book, that it may be for the time to come for ever and ever: That this is a REBELLIOUS PEOPLE, lying children, children that will not hear the law of the LORD: Which say to the seers, See not; and to the prophets, PROPHESY NOT UNTO US RIGHT THINGS, SPEAK UNTO US SMOOTH THINGS, PROPHESY DECEITS:” Isaiah 30:1-3, 8-10, KJV
“I have spread out my hands all the day unto A REBELLIOUS PEOPLE, which walketh in a way that was not good, after their own thoughts;” Isaiah 65:2, KJV
“But this people hath A REVOLTING AND A REBELLIOUS HEART; they are revolted and gone . . . The prophets prophesy falsely, and the priests bear rule by their means; and my PEOPLE LOVE TO HAVE IT SO: and what will ye do in the end thereof?” Jeremiah 5:23, 31, KJV
“For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry . . . ” 1 Samuel 15:23, KJV
To see many more of my KJV Bible verse lists, go to:
“For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, HAVING ITCHING EARS; And they shall turn away their ears from the truth, and shall be turned unto fables.” 2 Timothy 4:3-4, KJV
“Now go, write it before them in a table, and note it in a book, that it may be for the time to come for ever and ever: That this is a rebellious people, lying children, children that will not hear the law of the LORD: Which say to the seers, See not; and to the prophets, PROPHESY NOT UNTO US RIGHT THINGS, SPEAK UNTO US SMOOTH THINGS, PROPHESY DECEITS:” Isaiah 30:8-10, KJV
“The prophets prophesy falsely, and the priests bear rule by their means; and my PEOPLE LOVE TO HAVE IT SO: and what will ye do in the end thereof?” Jeremiah 5:31, KJV
“Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world.” 1 John 4:1, KJV
To see many more of my KJV Bible verse lists, go to:
